Didnt really have much free time and inspiration on posting recently. Busy with mid-term exams, assignment on writing resume, preparing notes for maths presentation and revising.
Finally most of it are done, now left with coming friday's mid-term, 25% of total result! must score well for it.
At first just wanted to update my blog by adding an empty post, then it reminds me about what i had learnt about "empty set".
Empty set is also consider as a set. For example, how many ways to arrange zero distinct chairs in a row? If one recalls what we had learnt in secondary (or JC, i cant remember), the total number of ways is 0! = 1, why zero factorial (0!) is one? because one way of arranging zero distinct (implies that the order matters) chairs is to do nutting.
So we can see it as the one and only way to arrange zero distinct chairs is to do nutting. Therefore by convention, 0! = 1. Dont believe me go use you calculator and see what you get for 0!.
In short, one way of writing a post is to not to write anything,which is an empty post! Think I'm too carried away, writing crap on this post. Actually this post is meaningless, it is just an "empty" post. (in term of content)
~milkteaisthebest~
#033 造句乐趣
这些都是以前一位朋友发给我的一封电邮《一位中文老师的告白》，其中一些有趣的造句。
题目：一边... ，一边...
小朋友写：他一边脱衣服，一边穿裤子。
老师批语： 他到底是要脱还是要穿啊？
题目： 其中
小朋友写： 我的其中一只左脚受伤了。
老师批语： 你是蜈蚣吗？
题目： 陆陆续续
小朋友写： 下班了，爸爸陆陆续续的回家了。
老师批语： 你到底有几个爸爸？
题目： 难过
小朋友写： 我家门前有一条水沟很难过。
老师批语： 老师更难过。
题目： 又... 又...
小朋友写： 我的妈妈又矮又高又胖又瘦。
老师批语： 你的妈妈是变形金刚吗？
题目： 你看
小朋友写： 你看什么看！没看过啊？
老师批语： 没看过。
题目：欣欣向荣
小朋友写： 欣欣向荣荣告白。
老师批语： 连续剧不要看太多了！
题目： 好吃
小朋友写： 好吃个屁。
老师批语： 有些东西是不能吃的。
题目： 天真
小朋友写： 今天真热。
老师批语： 你真天真。
题目： 果然
小朋友写： 昨天我吃水果，然后喝凉水。
老师批语： 是词组，不能分开的。
题目： 先... , 再... 例题：先吃饭，再洗澡。
小朋友写： 先生，再见。
老师批语： 想象力超过了地球人的智慧。
这也让我想到有时和朋友开玩笑的对话：
甲朋友：明天你打算做什么？
我回答：做爱做的事。
甲朋友迟到。
乙朋友：怎么又迟到？
我搭腔：就是说嘛，你这月经常迟到。
用水果造句：这杯水，果然很好喝。
暂时就想到这几个，下次再加多一点。
~milkteaisthebest~
题目：一边... ，一边...
小朋友写：他一边脱衣服，一边穿裤子。
老师批语： 他到底是要脱还是要穿啊？
题目： 其中
小朋友写： 我的其中一只左脚受伤了。
老师批语： 你是蜈蚣吗？
题目： 陆陆续续
小朋友写： 下班了，爸爸陆陆续续的回家了。
老师批语： 你到底有几个爸爸？
题目： 难过
小朋友写： 我家门前有一条水沟很难过。
老师批语： 老师更难过。
题目： 又... 又...
小朋友写： 我的妈妈又矮又高又胖又瘦。
老师批语： 你的妈妈是变形金刚吗？
题目： 你看
小朋友写： 你看什么看！没看过啊？
老师批语： 没看过。
题目：欣欣向荣
小朋友写： 欣欣向荣荣告白。
老师批语： 连续剧不要看太多了！
题目： 好吃
小朋友写： 好吃个屁。
老师批语： 有些东西是不能吃的。
题目： 天真
小朋友写： 今天真热。
老师批语： 你真天真。
题目： 果然
小朋友写： 昨天我吃水果，然后喝凉水。
老师批语： 是词组，不能分开的。
题目： 先... , 再... 例题：先吃饭，再洗澡。
小朋友写： 先生，再见。
老师批语： 想象力超过了地球人的智慧。
这也让我想到有时和朋友开玩笑的对话：
甲朋友：明天你打算做什么？
我回答：做爱做的事。
甲朋友迟到。
乙朋友：怎么又迟到？
我搭腔：就是说嘛，你这月经常迟到。
用水果造句：这杯水，果然很好喝。
暂时就想到这几个，下次再加多一点。
~milkteaisthebest~
#032 新语教学之日常篇
Welcome back to my Singlish teaching lesson. Before the I start the lesson proper, I would like to clarify something to prevent potiential future confusion.
Singlish is NOT broken english; broken english is a common mistake that we Singaporeans make, mostly for those who were chinese-oriented. In their mind, they tend to form their sentences in Chinese and then translate to english before they speak, thus the sentence structure of their english are incorrect or broken. Though it may be broken, foreigners are still able to guess and understand what it means.
But for Singlish, it is a language which Singaporeans speaks chinese, but combines it with english, and even dialects (for basic level we mainly talks about english only). Unlike broken english, we dont need to go through the sentence in our mind once and translate it, Singlish comes naturally. We can instinctively form a sentence in Singlish with much thinking (actually we dont think when we are speaking Singlish).
In summary - broken english is Chinese --translate to--> English, and Singlish is (Chinese + English + Dialects) fused together. Singlish is an art and i doubt foreigners will ever master it.
Okay back to lesson, today we will be giving a brief idea of when will the chinese words be in english. Its very difficult to be specific on when to use what, so i came out with a simple technique to roughly know which words to use.
When there is a choice of words with the same meaning, choose the one with lesser syllables. The following is some or the more commonly used Singlish in our daily life:
华语 -------------------- 新语
因为 -------------------- Cos
所以 -------------------- So
但是/可是 -------------- But
还是 -------------------- Still
然后 -------------------- Then
如果 -------------------- If
是不是 ------------------ Is it
对不对 ------------------ Hor
到目前为止 ------------- So far
Now i will form the chinese sentence followed by the Singlish sentence for comparison.
华语 - 因为他昨晚没睡好，所以今天迟到。
新语 - Cos他昨晚没睡好,so今天late.
华语 - 如果我告诉你，你能保守秘密吗？
新语 - If我告诉你,你能keep secret 吗？
华语 - 我是很想跟你们去购物，可是我的还有功课没做完。
新语 - 我是很想跟你们去shopping, but我的还有homework.
华语 - 你是不是把手机留在厕所里？
新语 - 你把手机留在toilet, is it?
华语 - 你先把滑鼠对准这个文件，然后点击两下。
新语 - 你先把mouse对准这个folder, then double-click.
华语 - 他什么都好，就是小气了点，你说对不对？
新语 - 他什么都好，就是小气了点，hor?
华语 - 到目前为止，他还是没有回复我。
新语 - So far, he still没有reply我。
Hope that until now you are able to follow.
Just 2 things to point out, you may notice that in the last Singlish sentence, the "他" became "he". This is a type of special cases, I call this 'Language Automatic Translate To English' - LATTE, where a single chinese word in between a few english words, in this case we will say "he" instead of "他". Again, i will talk more about LATTE in the future.
Another point is about "hor", beside the meaning of "对不对", it is used when you want to stress and emphasise a your point or when there is a short break between your sentences. Most of the time it is used behind the Singlish words mentioned above. Note: don't use two "hor" in a sentence. This is also another special case called 'Second Hor Is Terrible' - SHIT.
- 你先把mouse对准这个folder, then hor, 你double-click.
- If hor, 我告诉你,你能keep secret 吗？
- Cos hor, 他昨晚没睡好,so今天late. / Cos他昨晚没睡好,so hor,他今天late.
I think that is all for now, i will teach more on the choices of words next time. Just a recap, today you learned a basic technique for choice of words when forming sentences, and two special cases - LATTE and SHIT. I hope that you enjoyed this lesson and wont find it too dry.
*Lastly, always keep in mind that this is just a mocking blog on Singlish. Please don't really go and learn all this SHIT and LATTE thingy. Speaking proper English or Chinese is always the best way of communication.*
~milkteaisthebest~
#031 新语教学之学校篇
*Today while I'm on my way to school, I suddenly recalled several interesting words that we use when we were in primary and secondary school. So I have decided to write it down, thought my title is 教学 which mean teaching, i don't encourage anyone to learn or even practices it. These are just for laughter. *
For those who don't understand what i meant by 新语, its a short-form for 新加坡语 or more commonly known as Singlish. One more thing, if anyone spotted that i made any mistakes, please let me know.
Singlish is a unique language in Singapore, should we be proud of it? For now keep that answer to yourself, at the end of this blog, ask this same question to yourself again.
First and foremost, I shall write a sentence that I really did say it when I was on the phone with my friends. I didn't realise how bad it was myself until my girlfriend started laughing. I shall skip the rest of the conversation.
"If 我今晚 can make it for 宵夜, then 我再 let you know."
I believe most of you understand what I'm trying to say, right? This is the standard of Singlish that we should learn in this blog.
Always remember that Singlish often can be said in 2 ways - English or Chinese. But some can only be said in English or Chinese.
In school, we often need to name several stationery during our conversation in class. So we shall start by learning the correct saying of some stationery in Singlish. For objects that can be said in both languages, i will leave them out.
In the list below, I will state both its English and Chinese name plus how we say it in Singlish.
English/华语 ---------------- Singlish
Paperclip/回形针 ----------- Paperclip
Eraser/橡皮擦 -------------- Rubber
Stapler/订书机 ------------- Stapler
Staples/订书钉 ------------- Stapler bullets/ bullets
teacher/老师 --------------- Cher
Water-cooler/饮水器 ------- Water-cooler
Rubber band/橡皮筋 ------- Rubberband
Blu-tack/宝贴万用胶 ------- Blue-tack
Glue/胶水 ----------------- Glue
Now lets try to put them into sentence,
For those who don't understand what i meant by 新语, its a short-form for 新加坡语 or more commonly known as Singlish. One more thing, if anyone spotted that i made any mistakes, please let me know.
Singlish is a unique language in Singapore, should we be proud of it? For now keep that answer to yourself, at the end of this blog, ask this same question to yourself again.
First and foremost, I shall write a sentence that I really did say it when I was on the phone with my friends. I didn't realise how bad it was myself until my girlfriend started laughing. I shall skip the rest of the conversation.
"If 我今晚 can make it for 宵夜, then 我再 let you know."
I believe most of you understand what I'm trying to say, right? This is the standard of Singlish that we should learn in this blog.
Always remember that Singlish often can be said in 2 ways - English or Chinese. But some can only be said in English or Chinese.
In school, we often need to name several stationery during our conversation in class. So we shall start by learning the correct saying of some stationery in Singlish. For objects that can be said in both languages, i will leave them out.
In the list below, I will state both its English and Chinese name plus how we say it in Singlish.
English/华语 ---------------- Singlish
Paperclip/回形针 ----------- Paperclip
Eraser/橡皮擦 -------------- Rubber
Stapler/订书机 ------------- Stapler
Staples/订书钉 ------------- Stapler bullets/ bullets
teacher/老师 --------------- Cher
Water-cooler/饮水器 ------- Water-cooler
Rubber band/橡皮筋 ------- Rubberband
Blu-tack/宝贴万用胶 ------- Blue-tack
Glue/胶水 ----------------- Glue
Now lets try to put them into sentence,
- 我可以borrow你的stapler吗？Or 你有paperclip?
- 你有没有glue还是blue-tack?
- 我没有bullet liao.
- Cher,我去water-cooler装水。
- 我用rubber rub 了，but rub 不干净。
For the verbs it is more difficult to master when to use English and when to use Chinese, so we cover it in the future blog.
Are you able to follow so far? As a Singaporean I believe it isn't hard at all, if hard just put water to make it soft...
Now coming back to think of it, Singlish often brings laughter into our lives such as follow:
- Can lend me your tissue? (Can, but please don't bother to return me after using.)
- 你买这杯水还钱了吗？(我没欠那老板钱啊，还什么？）
- 小弟，除了肉骨茶，你要饭吗？ （你才要饭的，我要配饭吃。）
That's all for now, if the respond is good or I have any new ideas i will continue the next 新语教学.
~milkteaisthebest~
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